Everything in due time

Penguins mate for life. That doesn’t surprise me much because they all look alike. It’s not like they’re going to meet a really new great looking penguin someday .

I can’t decide whether that is good news or bad news- probably good, with survival benefits and all, but when I stretch it into a metaphor for this online journal…yawn. An awful lot of posts are starting to look alike and I despair of any really new, great reading material waddling in soon. Here, not at your place. Yours are all new and exciting to me. Actually, the penguins at the zoo are pretty exciting, too, although the new one is still under belly on the brood patch of mama or papa. Maybe next week.

It’s a hot time, summer in the city. Mostly wandering around at the zoo, back of my neck getting gritty. You know the tune. I am in the middle of a post about the zoo and my love hate relationship with them (zoos) and the challenges of life in captivity and then stretching THAT into a metaphor for my life. Since this may be the beginning of a novel, I wonder if that means Robin Andrea, who showed up in a dream for the benefit of that post, becomes a character in my novel? Don’t panic, R.A., it won’t be in a bookstore near you soon (aka, in this lifetime).

Let’s see, what’s new?

Two surgeries coming up. Why yes, one would be too easy, too light a sentence for whatever crime I committed during this karmic quarter. I have no idea- maybe it’s at the point where I’m being punished for even thinking about taking out a contract on someone. That doesn’t seem right or fair- thoughts are thoughts and unless you’re motivated crazy, really bad ones don’t become actions- but yes, I was considering a 2-fer this month. The world really would be a better place.  Anyway, instead I get two surgeries. Both surgeries involve removing things from my body- one in the hinterparts and one on my back, requiring plasic surgery. (Laurie Anderson is singing, "Well I stopped in at the Body Shop, Said to the guy:
I want stereo FM installed in my teeth. And take this mole off my back
and put it on my cheek. And uh…while I’m here, why don’t you give me
some of those high-heeled feet?*) except I don’t want this one on my cheek, which is only now healing from the 6 spots removed last week. Jesus! See how she never stops whining? And I’m going to smack my mum when I meet up with her. SPF ON YOUR BABIES!!! In the end, we’re hoping less is more.

Lost Loon Lodge, here I come. Not without some trepidation, I’m driving up to see the Bud and Jan Show only partly minus Jan next week. Her absence up there is, well, a presence. The cat sits on her box of ashes glaring at the world through slitty eyes- ears back and flat or perked up and listening enthusiastically depending on her mood-and Bud reads my mother articles from behind the paper (he has the paper up and forgets she’s not on the couch- or pretends she is) and I think he’s starting to channel her at county zoning commission meetings. He’s not eating well enough because he just doesn’t care about food beyond the energy factor, so I’m planning on taking a lot of food, stocking the freezer with easy to thaw meals and running him out to a couple of his favorite restaurants while I’m there.

There’s an overworked husband around here somewhere. Who would think that the 2016 Olympics would need to have all this planning done in 2007- and they’re still only a wish and a hope at that.  While he’s been busy figuring out what to do with 600 non-English speaking boxers this Fall (an important opportunity to showcase their hosting abilities for such sporting events) I’ve been planning a vacation for us.

In order to understand the concept of vacation I had to look up the word in the dictionary and while it’s no where near honeymoon (the one we will get to at some point) it’s also far from the listing for "boondoggle" which is most of what we do together. I’m certainly not complaining about all the fine boondoggles but we need to pack the fly fishing gear and dump the Blackberry.(Last September when he got his new company Blackberry he would carefully place it flat on the table and poke it with this anxious jerky motion, one letter or digit every few seconds. Now, he thinks I don’t realize that, although his eye contact over the linen table cloth is sincere-sometimes he bats his eyelashes to look seductive-he’s reading several pdf files and rendering opinions under the table. Blackberry footsie.) I had to plan this vacation around doctors and conventions and visiting children and trips to the Yoopie so, of course, there wasn’t much left in the way of hotels. Also, ringing in my ears is the admonishment to use "perks and points" since we spent everything on the Florida addition this past year. If I gave you all the details of this trip you would be so impressed (and understand why I’ve been too occupied on hold-your-call-is-very-important-to-us to write here) but suffice it to say that I have wrangled round trip airfare to Seattle, 2 nights at the W Hotel there, a rental car for a week and five nights on the San Juan Islands for under 1200. And lest you think we are going to be slumming it on those beautiful pricey islands, we’re not. We’re going to be camping.

Camping, you say? Pitching a tent, sleeping on rocks, reeking of campfire smoke? I think not…




So, that’s most of the news from here. Dan’s tour wraps up this weekend in Chicago after 35 cities and great sell out crowds. Literally sold out, unfortunately. Pitchfork Music Festival has no tickets left, nada, so I may end up seeing my son only when/if he shows up to crash here with friends. Time to get pushy, yes? I can’t really be held responsible for failing to realize that he is that hot a property- mother’s don’t think of their children that way- and I NEED tickets.

The Snarl is working herself silly in Florida. If I didn’t know better I’d think she’s into saving money for a house or more trips to Africa or something. She has about three jobs going and the nanny one keeps her tied up during the day so she can’t get over to the financial aid office where they have made a grievous error on her balance and put a hold on her registration. She retrieved the check from the bank, written and cashed, and they mumbled okay, right and never fixed it. I said, take care of it and she said, I always have these children in tow and I said, "Perfect. Use your head. Take them swimming all morning and then feed them lots of sugar for lunch and then, an hour after naptime should have started take them with you to the financial aid office and announce that you are not leaving until they correct your balance sheet and you have permission to register in hand. You’ll be amazed."

You are mistaken if you think I haven’t noticed:

-4th of July banners, sidewalk flowers, funny shoes, thinly veiled travel agent hype…

-Goats, puppies, ringworm, lice, doggy diarrhea (use Nature’s Miracle. If it works for feline mega bowel it will work for you.)

– Zen realtors, zen moments, zen bunnies

– Fish stories and a new piping plover banner

– Cow eyes, pretty peepers and wild flowers

-Digamy, summer camp and 7-7-07 (t’was Rich’s birthday, too!)

-Crocodiles and magic carpets

and terriers, and ponds and nymphs-on the water and on the balancing beam- and xenomorphs and that magic shawl you’re knitting and Harry Potter reviews and Chattanooga and psychocats and some moments of silence and calm on the west coast and so forth. I’ve been around. WENDE. I’ve been around- didn’t even miss the sermon on Sunday.
        How beautiful are thy feet with shoes, O prince’s daughter!       
        The joints of thy thighs are like jewels,   
        the work of the hands of a cunnning work(wo)man. (Solomon 7:1)

(I guess, really, I can’t comment on your joints, but the handiwork and the shoes!) I’ve been around and enjoying the visits. I just don’t have anything in particular to add, especially as I conserve words for this maybe book. A person only has so many, you know, and of those only one or two out of a pageful are any good. Hope you’re enjoying these warm sultry days.

(*Well I stopped in at the Body
Shop Said to the guy: I want stereo FM installed in my teeth And take
this mole off my back and put it on my cheek. And uh…while I’m here,
why don’t you give me some of those high-heeled feet? And he said:
Listen there’s no guarantee Nature’s got rules and Nature’s got laws
but listen look out for the monkey’s paw And I said: Whaaat? He said:
The gift of life it’s a twist of fate It’s a roll of the die It’s a
free lunch A free ride But Nature’s got rules and Nature’s got laws And
if you cross her look out! It’s the monkey’s paw It’s sayin: Haw haw!
It’s saying Gimme five! It’s sayin: Bye bye! I know a man he lost his
head He said: The way I feel I’d be better off dead. He said: I got
everything I ever wanted Now I can’t give it up It’s a trap, just my
luck! The gift of life it’s a leap of faith It’s a roll of the die It’s
a free lunch A free ride The gift of life it’s a shot in the dark It’s
the call of the wild It’s the big wheel The big ride But Nature’s got
rules and Nature’s
got laws And if you cross her look out! It’s the monkey’s paw! You
better Stop! Look around! Listen! You- could- be- an- oca- rina-
salesman- going- from- door- to- door. Or- would- you- like- to- swing-
on- a- star- and- carry- moon- beams- home? Or- next- time- around-
you- could- be- a- small- bug- Or- would- you- like- to- be- a- fish?
The gift of life it’s a twist of fate It’s a roll of the die it’s a
free lunch A free ride The gift of life it’s a shot in the dark It’s
the call of the wild It’s the big wheel The big ride But Nature’s got
rules and Nature’s got laws And if you cross her look out! It’s the
monkey’s paw It’s singin’: Gimme Five! It’s singin’: Bye-Bye!)


25 responses to “Everything in due time

  1. See why I think penguins are the coolest? If you watch that tv show, Dirty Jobs, there is a show where the host cleans a penguin exhibit. Funny stuff.

    Your surgeries – bummer. I’m putting off some exams as I know they always add up to more and more exams and junk. Yuk.

    Seattle is fun to visit. They have an excellent zoo. My brother in law is a musician, formerly in Seattle, now living in Port Townsend, a pretty Victorian style town on the water. A ferry’s ride from Seattle. We went over to Victoria B.C. from there during our last visit. Fab fun.

    Go on you for considering a book. You have the style and talent!

  2. Vicki, you may get ho-hum writing writing here, but we are never bored reading it!! I hope all your removals turn out fine. That is some high class camping situation you’re booked into. I could even consider that kind of camping….LOL

  3. I want that tent. To live in forever. It’s beautiful. Could I have owls in evening and an eagle soaring by day. Not too much to ask for, is it? I’m glad you’re writing again. I miss your singular beautiful voice in the whole entire blogosphere. Hope your surgeries go well. You can put me in a novel, but please let my skin be completely rash-free.

  4. Once again you make your what you call uninteresting days so interesting. I could be going through all that and would not even come close to describing it as you do. I’m envious of your gift.

    I e-mailed you back!

  5. Good Lord, where to start. I know, defending my honor! I’m not the only one bitching about the lack of posts from you: I’m just the only one BRAVE enough to leave my discontent in your comment box. Or, that’s my delusion and I’m sticking to it.

    I think you’re going to love our neck of the woods… it’s very peaceful up on the San Juans. The pace is so soothing, it reminds me of that sun drunk feeling you get on hot days without the need for sunscreen!

    Our feverish weather has undissipated, but I’m now in a pitch to fulfill orders. Apparently, when you run an ad you sell things. Who knew? Not much of anything, mind you, but enough to make it feel like “work” and thus create angst. However, I get angst when nothing is selling–I’m just angsty that way. It’s kinda like being “yeasty”.

    And YES, it’s all about me, I thought we’d established that!

    Seriously, I’ll be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers as you face these surgeries. And for safe travel. And for face time with the boy. And for your penguins. . . not that they need it.

    PS– This book of yours? I do hope you’re bringing proofs to read to us in August.

  6. Since you’ve firmed up your vacation plans, begun your novel, and FINALLY posted, perhaps you would consider writing a play based on Richard and Florence Atwater’s MR. POPPER’S PENGUINS, one of my Maddie’s favorite tall tales.

    Rich would play Mr. Popper (Papa). You, of course, would play Mrs. Popper (Mama – a gentle soul who never scolds Papa). Janie and Bill would be played by Snarl and Son-Who-Didn’t-Think-To-Procure-His-Mother-Tickets.

    Captain Cook, the Adélie penguin, would be played by Bud. Do you think Hoss would mind playing the female penguin, Greta? It’s really hard to tell the difference between male and female, n’est-ce pas, Madam Docent? Wait – Robin Andrea could be Greta and Hoss could be the hero, Admiral Drake, who gets Mr. Popper out of jail.

    Your “campsite” could be Stillwater and the North Pole could be the top of the Seattle’s W hotel. Your Chicago home could be the set for the play within a play!

    All the world’s a stage, you know.


  7. What Babette didn’t mention is that Penguins are HOT literary and film products. THEY SELL. heh.

  8. Seems to me the No. 1 son could scare up some no tickee no laundry. Whatever else are kids good for?

    This is an interesting post. You suppose you can get me hired as an ocarina salesman? I’ll take on mouth harps on the side, if they want.

  9. How truly weird and completely inconsequential: you are the second person in as many weeks to announce their spouse’s birthday as 7/7. It is also my husband’s birthday (cue the twilight zone music).

  10. Thought about you today when I had finished reading my oldest child the riot act and then felt all discombobulated and took the younger kids to Harry Potter.

    It was good.

    The clouds are pink in the baby blue sky. I am very sleepy. It is not yet 9 o’clock. I may just put down my computer and stare out the window for awhile.

  11. Oh now that is my idea of camping.

    Hope the surgeries go well.

  12. Looks like a fabulous “camping” trip at a great price. I hope you enjoy. Your posts are so full of information, when I’m finished reading, I barely remember all the things you’ve written about! Do you have those song lyrics in your head or do you look them up before you post? Good luck with your surgeries.

  13. Indeed I am enjoying these sultry summer days. I think I have gotten the hang of it now after a few angst-y weeks.

    I am supposed to be packing for my own little beach vacation–but instead I find myself distracted by your post and by various comments on your post. Josh just came down and GLARED at me. Hmmmph.

    Vicki, you flit here, you flit there. You think that you don’t have anything interesting to say, but here we are, falling all over ourselves to leave comments.

    My favorite part of this post: your advice to Snarl. Now that’s good thinkin’.

  14. Absolutely EVERYTHING is telling me that WA is where we are supposed to vacation this year. And now you are going there. That looks pretty heavenly. My cousin has invited me out for another cuz’s birthday in the fall – August. I’m thinking the timing might be perfect. I’ve never been so far West.

  15. Now what on earth will Dan say when another mother’s son provides tickets to the Metropolitan Opera performance of “The Flying Dutchman”? He has until 2010 to change his ways!

    Good luck with those nasty surgeries… yes, sunscreen your babies………cannot be stressed enough!

    Stressed? Hot? Penguins…. take me away!

  16. First, good luck with your surgeries and heal quick and well.

    Second, I’m thinking that is the mother of all tents.

    San Juan Islands … isn’t that the site of the Pig War?

  17. PEnguins are in these days, and I hope that we will be able to connect during your West Coast junket. It has cooled down from almost 100 to thunderstorms and 60s. It feels good, like a release of tension in the air. I’m hoping that my balance beam whiz hasn’t screwed up her back horribly. I do hate gymnastics at times.

  18. Can I come with you? My remaining folks (the parents have passed away, but I have a few steps scattered around) are in the San Juans now, I think – they have a cabin there. And I second the Port Townsend tip: that’s my hometown, and well worth a visit.

  19. Ok. I am a really bad bad penny ( I do like your usage of this term). I didn’t call while I was in town because I got in at midnight. I figured by that point Surely Vicki is already asleep and I wouldn’t want to bother you, knowing you probably had a busy weekend. I promise next time I come into town, I will visit.
    Hell or highwater, and chances that you are around…I will visit.

  20. If you guys had a tent like that up in Grand Marais, I might just defect from work in spite of the threat of a good firing. *lol*

  21. Where are you? You are missed.

  22. Fossil penguins from Argentina were five feet tall and had long, pointed, stabby beaks, but they went extinct because you didn’t update your blog.

    or maybe climate change.

  23. Michelle is funny! I really should meet her.

    Worrying about our Vicki is not funny. Is everything ok??!!

  24. Penultimate comment was mine. Be well!

  25. Ms. Michelle…. we must see you in August for this little NW round up!

    And Ms. Vicki… I have a box for you Dahling. And yes, yes, you’re going to post and give me flim flam about slow connections and busy work and writer’s block… and I will be sympathetic because you will have actually BLOGGED!

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