The final Ann Arbor meeting of PCMA (Poker Club My Ass, which is a subcommittee of BCMA- Book Club My Ass) was moving along nicely until FG upped the ante. Normally, we play for chips or small change but seeing as the moving van arrives tomorrow morning at 8 AM this gathering was partly a ruse for one last tidy-up.
Because we were completely bogged down with packing we convened at our place but we didn’t do any of the food. Patti brought meatballs in a crock pot, a delicious salute to Rich’s Lutheran roots, and plenty of potables. Audrey made her chocolate cloud cake and Kristen roasted summer vegetables to go with a great garlic and Spanish olive oil dip. So we ate well and began playing Texas Hold’em with home canned tomatoes, the remaining contents of my pantry and plants too large for the new place as prizes. Everyone was delighted and the betting was bold. Until FG upped the ante. At some point, he decided the time was right to bring up the miscellany from his office and plonk it in the middle of the table. He seemed to have an endless supply.
On this particular hand the winner got:
The Book, KJV, "in Spectacular Stereo" on 12 audio cassettes
A 12 year old Brita water dispenser
2 Burt Bacharach and 1 Andy Williams "Greatest Hits" on vinyl.
A SuperBowl XXXIII gym bag
QuickBooks for MS-DOS
A faux wood mini cabinet for audio cassettes
The TeleZapper, a device that, when your land line is routed through, zaps telemarketers??
The oldest cell phone ever made, by Blaupunkt
Half of an intercom set
And an ESPN water bottle
You can see that the flop was good- 2 Kings and an Ace. When a third King showed on the river, Patti dumped her pocket King as fast as she could. In fact, it took less than 10 seconds for the entire table to fold, leaving Kristen the winner. We didn’t make her take that pile of schlock.
Instead FG offered to help her load the giant peace lily she had won earlier in the evening- and that was when we discovered that the inner pot was sitting in a large outer pot of the most stagnant water any of us had ever smelled- ever. The stench, when the pots were separated, was so unbelievably bad everyone collapsed in hysterical laughter. This sodden disaster weighed easily 40 pounds but FG was determined and loaded it into several large black plastic bags. It was still truly awful. Then two of the guys wrestled it into her car where Kristen seatlbelted it snug lest it spill or drip.
The smell in her car was as foul as anything you can imagine but Kristen left, all windows down, optimistic that she could turn this horticultural nightmare around with a little sunshine and fresh air. Everyone else packed up their canned goods, plants and spices and we said our tearful goodbyes. We have been good friends for many many years, as much as 30 and it’s hard to imagine not seeing these people on a frequent and regular basis. The first Chicago meeting of PCMA will be in early November.