Cupid’s slings and arrows

(This piece is posted over at mommybloggers.com as part of their Valentine’s Day Love Post Marathon. Go see- the place is abloom with love. My bit is very true, but kind of sound bite sappy. What I didn’t write about- because I only remembered it after I added the visual-is what the heck is up with his hair? It was a week before the wedding, which was dignified, reverent, adult, fun, delicious and a musical blast. It’s the wedding you would have had if you had any sense the first time around. And on this day, a week before, my best friend was coming to take photographs that would be in the guest book. While I was getting tidied up, finding my best white blouse and pearls, the man of my dreams wandered off…and shaved his own head. For no apparent reason. Badly. Very very badly. Note the bare bald patch. And the mullet like growth at the back of his neck. And then he looked for all the world like a Charlie Brown cartoon. For the next month, he would be foolishly shorn. This is true love: You marry him anyway. I did and it is.)
_____________________________________________________

When did I think love was sixteen, new, friendly and kind, and would rescue me from the loneliness of home and an out of step adolescence? We grew up together and we were friends, but then life called us apart. In the end, we went our separate grownup ways.

When did I think that love was an angst ridden knight tilting at windmills with an undercurrent of seething resentment towards women? The drama was high, so was the chemistry and together we made beautiful babies. But really, in the end, he never did want to be married.

When did I think love was one of life’s misfits who needed a human alarm clock and a handful of inhalers? His intentions were good and his heart was right. Was it his fault he couldn’t work, catch a plane, order dinner out or, for that matter, breathe? In the end, he died.

And then I decided I had two children to love, many friends, a career, a cat, a home, a cottage and a vintage Airstream trailer. Who needed more?

When did I realize that love grows (older), it is patience (taxed), forgiveness (for what seems unforgivable), gentleness (in the face of harsh reality), laughter (in the midst of tears), sharing (when you want the best piece for yourself) and hopes and dreams (sometimes dashed)? It’s just now dawning on me.Us

25 responses to “Cupid’s slings and arrows

  1. Everywhere I go tonight, someone has posted something that makes me cry a little bit.

  2. True love conquers all! You are the cat’s pyjamas, Vicki! Details regarding the musical blast, please.

  3. O, that is so sweet. You’re an amazing woman, V. He’s a lucky guy!

  4. Thank you.

  5. This makes me sigh, the deep sighs of understanding.
    This makes me cry, the tears of having been there.
    This brings me joy, knowing how much joy you bring each other.
    This gives me hope, and hope is really all there is in the end.

    PS: Yes, you had better marry him, hair or no hair. You have found your home in his arms.

  6. Now that caused me to tear up. How thoughtful, how truly loving.

  7. Sweet picture… hilarious story!

  8. I’m not much for sentiment but that’s actually quite touching what you’ve written here. Thanks for sharing.

  9. What a great piece and super photo. Makes me all weepy-eyed. Thanks (I guess).

  10. What a lovely post! Thanks for sharing.

  11. It is so true how we learn what love is and isn’t–through just living life with all its ups and downs. The road doesn’t always lead us where we want or expect. A beautiful post.

  12. Very touching and hopeful. Thanks for sharing this. 🙂

  13. I’m not sure which is more touching – the post or the picture. I love them both, Vicki. Happy Valentine’s Day to you and that sweet man that dawned on you.

    xo

  14. Deeply thoughtful and beautiful, Vicki.

  15. I read this over at Mommy Bloggers and came to tell you that you made me teary eyed.

  16. Hey! Remember me??

    That last part – “When did I realize that love grows (older), it is patience (taxed), forgiveness (for what seems unforgivable), gentleness (in the face of harsh reality), laughter (in the midst of tears), sharing (when you want the best piece for yourself) and hopes and dreams (sometimes dashed)? It’s just now dawning on me.”

    Boy, thats good.

  17. Hot digity! That is some GRANDTASTIC writing Mz. Vicki! WOW! 🙂

  18. Eternal…. righteous….

  19. That’s beautiful, Vicki.

  20. Oh yeah..that’s what I’m sayin’. 🙂

  21. Somebody loves you enough to comment twice.

    A little bird told me you were flatlining in Ann Arbor. That city has that effect on many, methinks. Maybe you should tie some flies or practice your yoga?

  22. That is so beautiful.

  23. This is really lovely, Vicki – both the writing and the photo.

  24. I absolutely adore this post.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s