The work week has been a good structure to keep the weekend from looming too large but today I can’t put off facing the two chapters that are ending.
This afternoon and tomorrow will be with Abby (yes, Ms. Turtle Dreams has a name…). We’re doing last minute shopping for linens and lamps and making lists and copies of numbers: bank accounts, student ID, driver’s license, birth certificate, passport and social security, doctors and dentists. As though she’s moving to Africa, not Florida. I’m insisting on a pointless physical; she’s perfectly healthy. At this moment she is putting the final touches on her narration of the Inland Seas movie she’s been working on. All needs to be finished by Monday.
Sunday we will have a wake for Ed, here in the house where I live with my husband. The entire community of friends lives elsewhere, except me, and we realized that everyone always convened at Ed’s house, especially during football season. It wasn’t as much about football as it was the ritual and routine of getting together. Ed’s was the place to be on Saturdays. The marching band would wind up about 6 AM at the end of the block; parking cars, drinking beer and shootin’ the breeze would commence at noon. We would all sit on the porch and crowd watch, then some would go to the game and some watch it on TV at Ed’s with the Goodyear blimp circling overhead. Afterwards the partying would start all over again.
Having it here, as odd as it is, brings home to me the best gift that Ed gave me. When I couldn’t stay with him he behaved in a way that allowed us to heal and let me fall in love, get married and build a life with Rich. And still remain friends. Now I am so fortunate to have a husband who is secure enough in our love to allow me to celebrate that friendship.
Just how lucky and sad can one person be? I’m finding out.
SRP poses an interesting question at Melange and it fits in with Mary’s discussion about different reactions to different children when they leave. Later today I’ll post a bit about how I felt when my son left and I’d love to hear Bonnie’s take on this, since she has already said goodbye to four children.
Faithful Ping who comes to help us out around the house a few hours a week asked softly a few days ago, "You friend die?" I said yes. And then she said, "Abby leave." I said yes. Then she said, "Ohhh…" in this quiet way she does before she turns away to mull things over and fold laundry. Last night I was out for a couple hours and when I came home there was a note on the kitchen counter that read, "refrigerator. Ping." In the garage refrigerator there are well over 200 dumplings and dim sum. No, she’s not available to come to your house.