I’m so sick of Hoss I could puke

“Tennesee Williams was a homo…” I got nothing because this computer at the Bud and Jan Show is older than Hoss and me combined. So how did they manage to get themselves a state-of-the-art NEC SuperScript printer? I would really like to know that. If you don’t count the last three ambulance rides to Marquette they haven’t gotten beyond the Mohawk Superette in 5 years and the Superette is usually out of Kraft Macaroni ‘n Cheese. They definitely don’t sell NEC printers.

I’m stuck here, in the land of copper slag, with no e-mail. no picture posting and the computer keeps shutting down before anything can get onto the site because it’s going at 28 bps. And actually, that’s just fine. This trip has me thinking a person should take a break ocassionally, especially when they don’t have anything to say. When Hoss wrote in a comment that Bonnie’s guest post was so good she should just take over this site and I could go find another one somewhere that gave me pause. Then the next day Jim was over here appalled with my post.

There’s a lot going on in my head and my heart up here at the Bud and Jan Show but it’s not ready to be in written form and maybe not ready to be shared. Also, it would require a computer with spell check. In the meantime, in an effort to give my folks a few laughs I took advantage of this magnificent printer and downloaded all of the June, July and August archives of Hoss (Old Horsetail Snake; you know where to find him and no way am I spending half an hour trying to create a link for you). Bud is reading them out loud to my mother. At this very moment I’m hearing, for the umpteenth time, about the time Hoss had his prostate gland removed…

Jan was an English professor for many years and Bud is a rough and tumble retired teacher. He taught for 30 years in the inner city of Detroit until cancer swiped his bladder and they retired here to the hinterlands of nowhere. And even now, he has 50 year old students tracking him down to thank him for what he did to help them turn into real people. One of them is the head librarian at the Library of Congress. So, like Hoss, he has his followers. And like Hoss he always has an appropriate greeting. Last time a former student showed up he said, “Well, what the Hell! You’re pretty brave to come all the way up here! We don’t usually get any black folks up here!” Stuff like that.

Bud’s laughing himself silly over the Mexican Jumping Bean explanation of pollution…

(although I wrote this tongue-in-cheek, as I re-read it I hear a hard edge. Not very gentle. It’s because, like this post, it’s only kinda funny being here- mostly it’s hard. Very hard. And Hoss, I love you because you bring laughs to hard times.)

9 responses to “I’m so sick of Hoss I could puke

  1. Vicki,
    I’ve been thinking a lot about how I come across on my blog and in comments as well. When I got together with other Asheville bloggers last week, one of them mentioned how different I am in the blogosphere as opposed to in REAL life. Of course, I asked, which me do you like better? He reply was both (he’s a psychologist, too). We decided that I’m tougher and more of a smartass on-line–which sometimes gives me pause, and/or makes me regret comments. Anyway, I should stop filling up your commment box and IM you sometime, but wanted to let you know that my mind is reeling on some of the same tracks…

  2. {{{Vicki}}}

    Your present malaise is nothing that can’t be helped by a good hot sauna followed by a nude romp in icy Lake Superior (photos please.) How wonderful that Hoss’ pennings are a bridge of laughter for you and the Bud and Jan Show!

    Jim’s a contrarian with a heart of gold and Hoss was only trying to encourage me to branch out from my “thin” posts i.e. some ancient, stuffy quote followed by some equally ancient stuffy artwork, followed by a tagline that makes daughters and sons everywhere feel neglectful and guilty.

    Just a reminder: I love the way you think, write, and blog…you better not go changing anything!

  3. Everyone I show Hoss’s writing to laughs and laughs. He, like you, is a gem. Bonnie has been a great guest host and I love her blog as well but I’m glad you’re back. Thanks for the laughs!


  4. And to think, just last year my youngest kid read my “blog” and said, “You know, you’re a few fries short of a Happy Meal.”

    Howdy, Peninsula dwellers. Mr. Happy, here.

  5. Never thought of reading Hoss outloud.

    Bedtime stories? If I can just leave out the word “wang” I think I’ll be fine.

    Vicki, I hope you’re kidding. No one wants a break from you, so you can’t take one.

  6. Is it cool there. Temperature wise I mean. If it is cool, that is all you need. Just relax. But don’t stay away too long. You are missed.

  7. Vicki, at least you have computer access! I have missed you so much while suffering the instant karma of a lightning strike. Now, the library affords me the use of a computer for a while. I never knew they did (can you believe it?). I will come back tomorrow! Judy

  8. Hoss is fun alright.

    (and get better stories)

  9. Hoss is fun alright.

    (and get better stories)

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