If they still sold that stuff FG would buy it. Especially if it came in bulk packaging. At the risk of blogging this subject to death (see Adult Supervision Required ) FG needs a lifetime ban on shopping at Sam’s Club. The peanuts are still here,shells and skins in the bedding, and this morning I discovered, hidden in with my canned tomatoes and hot sauce, this:
Two people live in this house with an occasional child or houseguest stopping in. We have two bathrooms- not 4 or 2.5 or 2 plus a powder room. We have two. One of us does not like or use perfumed bar soap. This is because one of us has, hmm, sensitive parts that are, well, sensitive so it works best to stick with Tide-Free in the washing machine and Kiss My Face shower gel from Whole Paycheck in the shower. I call it Kiss My Ass. Get it? Sensitive Parts? Kiss My Ass? Okay, moving on. Even if I did like or use bar soap you can believe me when I say it would not be Irish Spring. Irish Spring smells like soap bubbas use when they take their monthly bath. Irish Spring melts with heat and humidity and then reforms into some kind of crusty mutant soap cake when it cools. So I don’t think we would use 16 Super Size bars of Irish Spring in our remaining lifetime. This soap was packaged for use in a group home. And now it’s hiding in my tomatoes.
To counter FG’s fetish for Irish Spring I flush every bar of soap as soon as it gets to a size that might reasonably flush. The problem with this tack, of course, is that it creates the illusion that we actually are using Irish Spring at a fair clip. I’m thinking of telling the manager at Sam’s that FG has many previous arrests for check kiting and offering them a photo to post in the employee break room so all cashiers will turn him away. Here’s a cute one :